Do you ever look at a stranger’s face sometimes and think “OMG, this person must be a real time bully” or you just look at a face and you’re think to yourself “Oh… i really need to be careful around this person” OR maybe you are even the recipient of remarks like ” Hmm, this girl must be a total snob”. “Why does she look so angry” or the more extreme African one “this girl must be a witch”.
If you any of this fits a description of you, chances are you’ve randomly judged someone harshly based solely on face value OR you yourself has been a victim of unfair judgement based on how you look.
Now what are the potential reasons why you might look really unfriendly or unapproachable.
You’re always frowning
For someone like me that experienced a bit of bullying in my younger years ( junior secondary school to be precise ) as a result of me being quiet and having this innocent and gentle kind of look. I got so taken advantage of that i said to myself one day “Hey Ade, you’ve got to toughen up”, these bullies need to fear you”. You know lots of self motivating pep talk and then i did it. I came up with the meanest, hardest scowl i could muster at that young age till this kind of became my default everyday look unconsciously.
I totally forgot about it until when my room mates in the university randomly come to ask me “Ade, are you sure you’re fine”, “did someone offend you” or “why do you always look so angry”. That’s when i started learning how to consciously wear a smiley face because in reality i am actually friendly.
You have the “RBF”
RBF, short for Resting Bitch Face is a kind of disinterested, slightly annoyed, blank looking face which occurs naturally in some people. I mean you are not actually trying to look bitchy or unapproachable but you look it. You have the face. Even when you are not actively thinking of anything or when you are in a relaxed state of mind, a zen state, you still have that face.
It’s something you were most likely born with and share with a lot of famous celebrities. Think Kanye West, Kristen Stewart, Anna Kendrick, Emma Watson or even little Kaavia James ( Gabrielle Union and Dwayne Wade’s daughter ).
The “RBF” is not something you can change, although you can control it by putting up a smile on your face sometimes if you feel like it or if you want to put people in your immediate vicinity at ease.
You are always on the phone
If your aim when you are in public is to be undisturbed and left alone then go ahead and stay on your phone. Being on your phone all the time gives off a “i’m way too busy to engage in silly conversations with you” vibe. It’s the “i don’t want to be bothered” cue of today’s gatherings and only the brave can move past that. So if you are feeling a bit friendly and in the mood for conversations, you need to take your eyes off your phone sometimes.
You are way too Polished
This is potentially not a bad thing because who doesn’t want to look put together, sophisticated and classy fashion wise. I’m guessing no one. The only problem is that some people get wary of approaching people like that especially when the gathering doesn’t really call for extremely extravagant dressing.
I’m not saying you need to look unkempt or messy to please others. All i’m saying is that sometimes, do away the dark sunshades, let that strand of hair drop, tone down the make up into something more natural, and so on. Although this ultimately depends on the type of gathering.
So yea, that’s about it from this quarters. What other potential reasons do you know of, or why you think a person might look threatening and unapproachable to you? Please share in the comments, i’d love to learn from you.
